Stepping out of my comfort zone

Have you heard of the She Speaks Conference through Proverbs 31 Ministries? In case you don’t head on over there, She Speaks is “a conference where you will receive the tools and the confidence to answer God’s call on your life. You will learn how to make the most of your messages, the nuts and bolts of speaking, writing, leading, and influencing, and have the opportunity to meet with some of today’s top Christian publishers”. (Quoted from their website.)

And why am I telling you about this conference? Because a scholarship will be awarded to someone who explains why they want to attend and what they feel called to do. (Learn more about it here.)

And links up to their blog. Like, today.

Y’all, this is so not like me. I play everything safe in life. I don’t smoke. I don’t ride motorcycles. I even bid too low when I play Spades! So attending a conference like this scares the daylights out of me. The flying alone, the rooming alone (or with someone I don’t know), and especially the peer writing critique groups totally freak me out. (What are they going to critique? I have nothing to give anyone at this point!)

But I believe I need to go.

I have a dream to be a novelist. The only image I have of myself when I “grow up” is sitting at a table in a big bookstore, signing books that I have written, taking the hand of a beloved reader who was moved by the words I wrote, and listening to her story.

Maybe that dream is a bit far-fetched, but maybe at the heart of it is something God gave me.

And a dream is all it’s ever been for me. After being a stay-at-home mom for eighteen years, I am at a point now where I have enough freedom to start stepping out of that role and seeking something new. I’m actually thinking about what I want to do - for the first time ever, really. (I’m not complaining here. I wouldn’t trade one moment I’ve had with my kiddos!)

But it’s not just the writing that I want to learn more about. I also believe the training in Women’s Ministries will be a huge help to me.

I got married and started having babies at 17, and not necessarily in that order. This year I will be 36, and for the past 13 years I have been in ministry in one form or another. I’ve led life groups with my husband and alone. I oversee our church’s nursery at the present time. I’ve prayed for people, loved on people, spoken truth to people-- in love, of course. And the one thing I’ve learned through all of it is this…

I have so much to learn.

But my heart is truly for people. Whether I am writing a great story for someone to enjoy or praying with a sweet young mother who is feeling over her head in dirty diapers and no sleep-- I want my life to be used in reaching the hearts of people and connecting them to the hearts of God.

And I truly hope my life reflects that, conference or not.